Patty Tracks: A Very Short Story

Barbara Billingsley decided to throw a block party on the block of 5600 Park Row Drive. Over three hundred people showed up. Everything was ready except for the hamburger patties. Barbara’s five year-old grandson named Scotty sat in the backyard with his dog named Fletcher.

Fletcher kept trying to get to the barbecue pit. But, the sheep dog could not reach the pit because he was not close enough to it. As a result, his chain kept yanking with each attempt. Scotty put two and two together and decided to help Fletcher.

Scotty decided to get a painter’s bucket, climbed onto the bucket, and tossed the burgers onto the ground with his frisbee. Scotty returned to his stack of blocks by the hedges as Fletcher munched on fifty grilled medium rare patties.

Barbara returned and could not believe what she saw in the middle of her backyard. Fletcher was finishing up the fiftieth grilled patty! She didn’t know whether to wring Fletcher’s neck, laugh, or cry about the situation because there were three hundred salivating mouths on her front lawn, gazebo, and patio.

Next, she looked towards her left and saw her grandson innocently stacking his blocks very quietly. Scotty could see his grandmother in the corner of his eye. He continued stacking his blocks as if nothing happened.

« Oh, God! What am I going to do? I am already two hours late!, » Barbara yelled to herself. « I guess I have to throw more patties down, » Barbara continued.

Barbara shook her head and walked away to put more hamburger meat on the grill. Barbara returned ten minutes later and began shaping the ground beef. She then began putting the circular shaped patties on the grill.

« Now, only if these patties would get done faster, » Barbara commented to herself.

« Let me help, grandma. »

« Sure, Scotty. Sure, » Barbara answered and walked away disgusted.

Scotty’s friend Buster watched Barbara walk away from the barbecue pit. Buster watched the entire incident happen from across the fence. After Barbara disappeared from view, Buster hatched a plan to hurry up and get the burgers done faster. He discussed his plan with Scotty. Scotty agreed. Next, Buster took his mid size battery operated tractor and placed it over the fence.

After placing it over the fence, he removed all of the patties and placed them neatly in three long rows. Then, he turned on his tractor and ran over the patties, creating mud tracks that resembled grill marks(he thought so, anyway). « O.K., Scotty! Dinner’s ready!, » yelled Buster.

« You can thank me later!, » added Buster.

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